Thinking critically, I'm not as changed by him as I thought I was.
I stopped drinking for him. I may have told people it was because I got raped under the influence, which is true, but it wasn't the biggest reason.
He didn't approve, so I didn't do it.
Now that we're not together, I'm stuck questioning if I'm okay with drinking.
I don't know if I'm comfortable with the lifestyle I've been leading, or the person I've become.

Actually, I just might. And I don't think I'm all too pleased with that answer.
I don't know how to become a better person.
I'll get back to that eventually.

I just wish we were talking.
We may have had nothing in common, but I still felt all nervous and jittery every time I heard him speak my name.
And nothing compares to the way I'd feel after not seeing him for a while- and then finally seeing him.
It's been almost a week since we talked.
I don't want to admit it, but it's killing me.
I don't know if I was replaced.
I don't know if he misses me, thinks of me, I don't know anything and it's driving me crazy.
I just want my best friend back.